As a woman (ladies you may be able to relate here) you can find me on any given day in any given moment in the midst of CHANGE. I am most compared to a chameleon of sorts. I change my hair colour frequently (more often when pre-children) my clothing style annually/seasonally depending on my mood, my acquaintances about every 2-5 years or depending on the situation and just plain love to morph and grow in about any 
direction I can.
I do alot of thinking and alot of soul-searching daily, it has just always been my nature to dig deep and reveal. I suppose I am not as mysterious as I would so love to be - however to 'get-in' to my psyche and actually understand it is a whole other challenge for most - so it has yet to be proven otherwise.
Currently I find myself sexually inhibited, and out of control as far as structured behaviour and looking for that next moment of change - however it is currently happening so fast and in my face lately that I am actually having a hard time getting a grasp on it all. I mean I am re-entering the public workforce (after 4 off & on years), leaving a substantial relationship, transforming my mind, body and soul, (so physically & emotionally) and coming to terms with it all in a short period of time. Just ONE of these would be alot for most people, but I find myself in this state at least every 5 years if not more when I was younger. But this time I not only have ME to take care of I have 2 other little ones, uhg. The pressure is almost killing me, and yet is also very exciting for what may lay upon the horizon. I no longer have to feel trapped in a situation where none of my needs where being met and I was perpetually unhappy. I look forward to the new me, the changes - who says this has to be all negative?! ... Oh yeah,.. That was me. AHHAHAHHAHA
Well I'm hoping to adopt "a new attitude" in order to get through this - and it is going to be a monumental change over the next 12 months, and definitely NOT going to be easy at the best of times - but I am ready for the change - this past that I am removing myself from, has ripped the life out of me - I am dull, lethargic, disengaged and for anyone who really knows the true Vesper Peeps knows that this is definitely NOT me! UHG. I'm so sick of this dry, dreary woman.
So keep an eye out, watch for the pics, and stories to come - I would appreciate all of your support along the way, this is going to be very bumpy. Thanks to CB for sticking it all the way through with me over the last 8 years ! WHOA! Can you believe it has been that long girrrrl?! and especially the last 4, I know you couldn't have told me to do anything more than what I have already done, and I celebrate the 2 wonderful little souls that have come of those decisions. Thanks for always being my rock of Gibraltar, non-judgmental, sympathetic, sensitive and "in-my-face" when you had to be. I can't say that even one family member has supported me so thoroughly when I needed it most - you were AND ALWAYS are there for me, and for that I am truly thankful. Love ya girl - here's to twenty more good years and partying well into our geezer days!
Here's hoping all your changes and risks are well worth it!
direction I can.I do alot of thinking and alot of soul-searching daily, it has just always been my nature to dig deep and reveal. I suppose I am not as mysterious as I would so love to be - however to 'get-in' to my psyche and actually understand it is a whole other challenge for most - so it has yet to be proven otherwise.
Currently I find myself sexually inhibited, and out of control as far as structured behaviour and looking for that next moment of change - however it is currently happening so fast and in my face lately that I am actually having a hard time getting a grasp on it all. I mean I am re-entering the public workforce (after 4 off & on years), leaving a substantial relationship, transforming my mind, body and soul, (so physically & emotionally) and coming to terms with it all in a short period of time. Just ONE of these would be alot for most people, but I find myself in this state at least every 5 years if not more when I was younger. But this time I not only have ME to take care of I have 2 other little ones, uhg. The pressure is almost killing me, and yet is also very exciting for what may lay upon the horizon. I no longer have to feel trapped in a situation where none of my needs where being met and I was perpetually unhappy. I look forward to the new me, the changes - who says this has to be all negative?! ... Oh yeah,.. That was me. AHHAHAHHAHA
Well I'm hoping to adopt "a new attitude" in order to get through this - and it is going to be a monumental change over the next 12 months, and definitely NOT going to be easy at the best of times - but I am ready for the change - this past that I am removing myself from, has ripped the life out of me - I am dull, lethargic, disengaged and for anyone who really knows the true Vesper Peeps knows that this is definitely NOT me! UHG. I'm so sick of this dry, dreary woman.
So keep an eye out, watch for the pics, and stories to come - I would appreciate all of your support along the way, this is going to be very bumpy. Thanks to CB for sticking it all the way through with me over the last 8 years ! WHOA! Can you believe it has been that long girrrrl?! and especially the last 4, I know you couldn't have told me to do anything more than what I have already done, and I celebrate the 2 wonderful little souls that have come of those decisions. Thanks for always being my rock of Gibraltar, non-judgmental, sympathetic, sensitive and "in-my-face" when you had to be. I can't say that even one family member has supported me so thoroughly when I needed it most - you were AND ALWAYS are there for me, and for that I am truly thankful. Love ya girl - here's to twenty more good years and partying well into our geezer days!
Here's hoping all your changes and risks are well worth it!
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